Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Last in line

That's how I always feel, like I've been made to go to the end of line. Like I always have to start over, or someone cuts in line.

In the last 4 days I've read about (on blogs or facebook) about endless pregnancy announcements. I must now know 20 pregnant people, plus people who I read their blogs. I am happy for them, really truly happy, but dude...

In the last few weeks, I've been put down by two family members - both said not so nice things about the only parties I've ever gotten to throw (We just moved into our house after 5 years in a 1 bedroom apt, where I couldn't have more than 1-2 guests at a time due to lack of parking). One told me that at the family Christmas party, that I made the potluck "too difficult" (I asked certain people to bring side dishes and some to bring desserts - is that difficult?) the other picked on the (themed- think wizards) birthday party I threw for my Godson this past week - saying she had seen better made decorations at a party SHE went to. I don't get it.

(this post is all over the place, sorry)

April 15 was the due date of our first child. On the first anniversary of this, I had another miscarriage. It's a day where I HAVE TO get away, and be away from people (Husband is acceptable). I prefer someone with no kids. We don't have the cash this year to go anywhere, and I can't stop crying about it.


  1. I am so so sorry to read this post but I am glad you are getting it out there and venting. It's safe here. Don't let idiots get you down with stupid comments. They are just that... stupid.

    My heart goes out to you however for the 15th. I had an ectopic and almost died and it did a doosey on me a few years ago. My sympathies because it is very traumatic.

    Your time will come, I promise you. Just don't give up!!

  2. Hang in there. I will be thinking about you on the 15th. Don't hate the will never be able to figure them out. Try to just laugh at how stupid some people can be. Think, "no one puts Baby in a corner!!" Dirty I am showing my AGE!

  3. I bet that ones that are most critical are the ones that never host a thing. Seems to always work out that way. Someone is always going to whine, just let it roll off your shoulder :)

    I'm so sorry about the painful anniversary coming up. I'll be praying for you to have a nice peaceful day away from the world that doesn't cost a thing.