The Search

One of the things I hate is that I can't never (or hardly ever) find clothes to fit me. Forget needing something specific, because I just won't find it. I pretty much find all of my clothes at Walmart and the thrift store (and I HATE IT).

I can't afford to shop online or at Lane Bryant. I hate looking like a slob all of the time because my clothes are ill fitting.

Anyway, I needed a disney themed shirt to wear on our trip - could I find one?

NOPE!

It took a week of looking at every store in town that sells Plus size clothes before I found a shirt at Fashion Bug - and it was about 3 times more than I wanted to spend. (I just found out that Fashion Bug is owned by Lane Bryant. heh)

sigh. I can't wait to go shopping at a regular store. dammit.

Ten things Thursday - The It took me until Friday to finish this edition

1. Still almost regretting getting the band. I've lost 1 lb..in a MONTH. My body obviously doesn't care that I'm eating less. I don't get it. I hiked miles every day while camping (TWICE) and watched my food intake...nada. I'm ticked.

2. My fill is on Monday. I don't eat much now so I don't see how eating LESS is going to help me lose weight. Can you tell I'm frustrated?

3. Our Van died 2 minutes before we went camping. The price to fix it is crazy insane. It makes me feel ill the amount of work I'm going to have to do to pay for it. I wish my husband would find a job (once the car is fixed that is, it's bad enough begging my parents to drive me to my jobs)

4. I am going stir crazy at home. It's like 105. the air quality is bad. and we're not really in walking distance of much. (there is a grocery store with a s.bux in it about a mile away. but in the heat I am way too lazy to walk that mile)

5. not like we can afford to go to the store anyway, or have coffee. We are officially poor, poor, poor.

6. I am so desperate for coffee that I scrounged around in the cupboard until I found a instant coffee packet. As soon as my ice is frozen, I will be enjoying THAT with skim milk and some Torani caramel syrup. I hope it satisfies me!

7. and now it's friday! oh well. Anyway, we spent the day making my parents drive us around, my cat had a appointment at the vet to be spayed (finally!!) at the crack of dawn. She's home now and doing great!

8. We also had to go to the courthouse to file some papers on "something". I will update more about it later, I just don't feel comfy posting about it yet. but it's a VERY good thing, should it work out.

9. NINE days until we leave on Vacation! I'm on a quest! A Quest for FUN! A quest to see...a rodent. "Rodent" is our family code word for anything Mickey or Dis.ney, of course. I am so stoked.

10. Before we got poor, I ordered Disney pins from eB.ay so the Godson and I could try out Disney pin trading. Has anyone done that before???

Stupid

We've been away camping. It was a mix of "omg this is soooo much fun" and "dude, I am never doing this again" that I will write about later.

While we were camping (at a State Park, with a lake) - we went fishing twice. I love to go fishing, but in the like, 14 years that I've lived here, I've only caught 1 fish. We still go, anyway, every year.

Anyway, there was a family with 2 kids fishing at the same time we did. They were taking up the entire dock and bridge with all of their STUFF and were catching fish after fish. We were catching nothing.

We wandered over to them (just me and Godson D) and asked if we could fish off the bridge with them.

After about 20 minutes, I did a cast and I messed up - I didn't cast the fishing rod correctly, and my line and hook got caught on the bridge.

Immediately after, the little boy in the other family (maybe 8-9 years old) says "That's the STUPIDEST THING I've ever seen...ANYONE DO!" (laughing and pointing)

At first, I didn't realize he was talking about me. I turned and asked - was that about me? about my mistake?

Yes.

I grabbed my stuff, took D's hand and went back to our family. I put my head down on the picnic table and cried.

I cried over what a stranger, a kid said to me.

It was like I was 8 years old again, and someone at school or on the playground was teasing or taunting me. I am sensitive. I am a crier. and I'm pretty sure making me cry was a playground activity like Handball.

Why did it bother me do much? I'm still working on that.